Wallbanger by Alice Clayton

15858248
Grade: B
Hotness Level: Inferno
Kink Level: No Kink
Genre: Contemporary
Published: 11/27/12
Reviewed by Anne

Caroline moves into her new apartment and loves it.  Until she wakes up in the middle of the night to the sounds of her next door neighbor having sex.  The walls are paper thin and she can hear everything.  The next night she hears him with a different woman.  And the next night with a third.  That’s when she’s had enough and she stomps over to pound on his door…

So, I’ll admit, I’m late to the Wallbanger party.  I remember reading reviews long ago and putting it on my “buy this book and read it soon” list.  I’d heard it was funny, and it really is!  I’d also heard it was Twilight fan fiction, and that ended up taking away from my reading experience.  Because it was so easy to see who was who, I had some expectations.  It was very jarring to me when the characters acted differently than their Twilight personalities.  And just when I had accepted Caroline and Simon (the wallbanging neighbor) as “Caroline and Simon” instead of “Edward and Bella,” they go and do something very Edward and Bella-ish.  It was very frustrating to me!

For most of the book I really loved the pacing of the relationship between Caroline and Simon. When I realized what a man whore Simon was, I was worried that Caroline would join his harem.  I was so glad that they became friends and things developed at a slower pace between them!

Caroline and her friends were funny.  I really enjoyed the secondary storyline about her friends’ relationships.  I can’t say enough how much this book made me smile!

On the other hand, there were some things that really bothered me.  The story is told primarily from Caroline’s point of view, which was fine, but there are a couple places where it jumps to someone else’s point of view.  It was done for comedic effect, and it was funny, but it was also a bit jarring.

Another annoying thing is the pacing of Caroline and Simon’s relationship.  I really liked it going slow in the beginning.  However, once they start dating, they both seem to really want sex but aren’t having it for a really long time – to the point of ridiculousness.  Even more odd, they don’t actually talk about it.  Caroline makes a decision as to when she thinks the right time is, and Simon seems to instinctually know this and agree.  That had me rolling my eyes.  It also made me yell at my iPad – “I don’t care what kind of food you’re eating!  Just have sex!”  Because, seriously, there was a lot of food description to wade through before there was any sex.

The worst thing about this story, though, was that Caroline has “lost” her “O.”  She hasn’t had an orgasm in a very long time and she misses it.  Does she take matters into her own hands?  No.  Why not?  I have no idea.  Seriously, this was the dumbest thing, and she kept going on and on about it.

Still, despite all that, I enjoyed the book.  I don’t know if I’ll read more Alice Clayton or not.  I’m not sure the enjoyment was worth the annoyance, especially because, as time goes by, I just seem to remember the annoyance, and not the enjoyment.  The author is writing sequels to this book, about the same characters.  I’ll probably be tempted in a weak moment – the banter between Caroline and Simon is pretty awesome!

The Royal Treatment by MaryJanice Davidson

574854
Grade: A
Hotness Level: Inferno
Kink Level: No Kink
Genre: Contemporary, Alternate History
Series: Alaskan Royal Family #1
Published: 5/1/2004
Reviewed by Kate
256 pages

 

This one is an oldie, but is one of my absolute favorites (the whole series is actually).  MaryJanice Davidson has written a world in which Alaska is it’s own country.  And it’s a country ruled by the most unking-like king you could possibly imagine.  King Alexander is ready for his oldest son, David, to settle down, get married, and start working on the next heir to the throne ASAP.  Prince David’s not all that interested in dating, after all he’s got his hands full taking care of his personal flock of penguins.  Christina is working in the kitchen on a cruise ship and after her boss gropes her, she knees him in the nuts and quits. She walks off the cruise ship which leaves her stranded in Alaska with only $50, so of course she uses the money to go on a fishing trip.  On the fishing boat, she meets the king (who’s trying to blend in with the commoners, and not doing all that well).  The king invites her to stay at the palace-can we say matchmaker?  Like I said before, Prince David’s not all that interested in dating…until he meets Christina.

I could go on and gush and gush about this book.  The wild, crazy, royal family that Christina finds herself with is an absolute hoot!  Not to mention some of the palace staff (Edmund in particular).  But even though the family is such a strong presence in the book, they don’t over shadow the romance.  The sigh-worthy, blush-inducing romance of Prince David and Christina.

Filled with MaryJanice Davidson’s quirky, whitty, snarky dialogue, this is one book that will have you laughing out loud and reaching for #2 (The Royal Pain) right after you finish the last page.  If you haven’t read MaryJanice Davidson before, I highly recommend you start with this one!

I love an author that can write funny snarkiness well, and MaryJanice Davidson is one of my faves.  Who are some of your favorite snarky authors?

Throwback Thursday- Immortal in Death by J.D. Robb

Immortal in Death (In Death, #3)
Grade-B
Hotness Level-Blaze
Kink Level-No Kink
Series-In Death #3
Genre-Romantic Suspense
Reviewed by Kay
322 pages

Eve Dallas’ latest case hits a little too close to home. Her best friend, Mavis is accused of murdering a top fashion model who used to date Mavis’ current boyfriend, Leonardo. Mavis had a few physical altercations with Pandora (the model), so when Pandora ends up dead, naturally Mavis is in trouble. Eve has to prove Mavis is innocent, she has to. So she enlists the help of Feeney (spell), Peabody, a illegals cop named Casto and Roark of course.

She goes into the most seedy clubs and meets sketchy characters all in her quest to prove Mavis’ innocence. And all the while getting ready for upcoming wedding to Roark. What she doesn’t realize is that proving her friend’s innocence is just the beginning of this mystery.

I really do like this series more and more as I go on. I love the characters and the relationships that take place here. Eve is a tough bitch, Peabody, a straight laced, no nonsense cop, Feeney, comic relief and Roark is sigh worthy, as always. I have already started book four and look forward to the next mystery to be solved.